ENDURING A BROKEN AND LONELY RELATIONSHIP


I waited patiently for his call. I had just broken up with him again. It was the second time in the same month. I sat down on a newspaper hedged between my bed and the cracked wall. I just wanted him to send me a message or call or even flash. I just wanted him to apologize and brag about how much he still loved me but minutes ran into hours and the only message I got was from Airtel.

Wiping my face with the back of my hand, I picked my phone and sent him a message. I told him I was really sorry and still loved him. I knew he had still accept me back. Actually, I wasn't sure this time. Almost immediately, he replied asking me what I wanted from him again. I found that quite rude but what choice had I?

' I want you back. I want us back. I miss us', I replied hastily.

I knew I didn't mean those words. I just wrote them all in a bid to get him back. I never really meant whatever I told him. I never really loved him. All I knew was that I was in a relationship with a guy who lives far off. The distance between the earth and the sky. He never called. He never sent me any messages and I believe he just didn't really care. We were strangers to ourselves.

Like we always did, we got back together and I was glad. I hoped for a 'new us' in the relationship but there was never a 'new us'. He kept telling me how much I changed my behaviour after we got together and how much I didn't show him much love like before and I also complained about how he never called or sent me any messages. I never almost felt like I was in a relationship. I was absolutely lonely. He tried to defend himself and as usual, we argued and went to bed bitter.

My phone vibrated and I woke up almost immediately. It was whatsapp notifications. I scrolled down to check if he had sent me any message but I got the shock of my life. He had updated a new profile picture of a girl. I am not the Jealous type but I tell you, he always did this and he never for once used me as his profile picture and when I asked him

'How is it your business?', he would ask.

I got to class Monday morning. I was glad that the assembly was over and I could get to my class before the principal comes out. Emmanuel, my best friend, jumped on me as the normal way of greeting. He had missed me but I wasn't sure if I had missed him. I was not just in the mood and he could guess it was relationship issue.

' This is why I don't support secondary school relationship. You gotta take a chill pill. Take a break from this guy. Remember we would soon write WAEC'

I wish it was that easy. It always easier said than done. But what was I really afraid of? There were other guys asking me out but I just thought of him as the perfect guy. I had imagined us getting married and I wrote his surname on all my text books. I was just scared I had never get a more better guy. I preferred being lonely in this relationship than being alone without a relationship. I couldn't just deal.

During break, Emma came into the class carrying a bottle of coke and scotch egg.

    'Lover girl', he teased as he sat in front of me

    'Not funny', I said, flipping through the pages of my text book. I wasn't reading it. I was just thinking.
    'You no go chop? Mama's buns go soon finish. You sabi as dem dey always rush it'

    'Am watching my weight'

    'You know you cannot lie to me. What is it this time around?'

    'He used a girl as his DP on whatsapp' Emma couldn't hide his laughter. I didn't see what was funny in what I said

    'My Baby don dey Jealous ooo'

   'I'm not Jealous and you know that! I just find it...like...I just...see, never mind. Just forget it'

   'Hmmm', Emma sighed 'I don't even know if I should tell you this latest gist or not'

   'Is it about me?', a jolt of concern ran across my face. 'Our bad belle class girls are gossiping about me, right?'

   'Lol. No. It's about your boyfriend'

I sat up immediately. 'And what about him?' Emma stopped eating and scratched his neck. 'Emma, talk to me!'

   'Babe, calm down na. I would tell you', he said but I was so impatient and my heart was beating so fast already. I couldn't almost think straight.

  'Am listening' My voice was more like a whisper.

  'Erm...he's asking our head girl out...'

  I pulled back and squeezed my skirt gently. I thought my heart had stopped beating. (...to be continued...)

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3 comments:

Unknown said...

cool story

Adeoye Adejare said...

Hmmmmmmmmmm.... response coming shortly

Emete Smart said...

tnx @ steve
waiting for your response @ adeoye